Friendship is a topic I have previously talked about on here. It’s something I thought about a lot as I graduated from school and prepared to officially start my career.
I’ve said it before, and I will say it again: I have some of the best, most loyal friends. However, I don’t think that’s too coincidental. Something I always preach to friends who need advice is to know who your real friends are. I’ve luckily always been a pretty realistic person and have prepared myself for the distancing of friendships as lives go in completely opposite paths. People change. Circumstances change. You can’t keep everyone in your life forever. But you can know who you can trust and who will be there through thick and thin.
However, one thing I am a bit surprised about is the empty words that seem to be behind so many “I miss you” and “I will see you soon” phrases. I never expect to be at the center of attention or for people to drop their lives for me, but it is a reality check when you realize the “friends” saying these things don’t plan on following through—even after giving them multiple opportunities. Of course, these “friends” I am shocked by are not my closest friends—I know who is always there.
I am of course not saying I am the model friend. I am so busy my friends know they need to contact me weeks in advance to get some space on my planner. However, when I say I want to see you, I mean it. And that is something I stand by.
Like I said, it’s just important to know who your real friends are. Not all friendships are meant to last, but I think if you have a good understanding of who may or may not be there for the long run eases the pain of a disintegrating friendship. If you’re struggling with this, ask yourself what you would do for a person. Then ask yourself if you feel confident they would do the same for you. That may help guide you who to spend your energy on.
Something I have come to accept is that sometimes maybe it is better to have fewer, but closer friends, rather than the opposite. Regardless, I think it is always important to remind those in your life that they are important to you. You may be surprised at how people respond.